Katamari Damacy Lyrics

If you are interested in the lyrics for Katamari Damacy, they are HERE

China Sucks

It seems that our Chinese friends are protesting because:
1. Japan claimed natural gas reserves inside legal boundaries.
2. Japan may win a permanent UNSC seat.
3. Japanese textbooks don't spend a chapter of self-loathing for the Rape of Nanking.

I remember when Chinese people protested legitimate problems:


And now the Trade Minister for Japan, Shoichi Nakagawa, calls China "scary."


Balls.

The only scary thing about China is its blatent hypocrisy. China killed 25 times the amount of its own citizens during the Cultural Revolution. China still terrorizes Tibet. China wants Japanese school children to learn about the atrocities committed by Japan (which can be found in ANY Japanese bookstore), while China strictly controls speech and press in its own country.

Koizumi et al, I have a wonderful quote for you to use. The next time protests flare up in China, and you have a statement to make, make this one.

"The actions of the Chinese are a clear result of communist indoctrination. We regret that the Chinese are not able to get the facts, because their government prevents them, but we would ask them to stop breaking things and threatening people. If they do not, we will be happy to move our business to somewhere else in Asia."

Elegant ni, shishite daidan ni!

I want this coffee!

My wife is playing, and I'm bored....

...and what is she playing other than the most addictive game for women, Katamari Damacy (The soul of conglomeration)「塊魂」. I've already beaten the game, and it is just one of those beautiful games that pushes the limits of Japanese graphic design to the fullest, like Rimo-kokoron (Remote controlled heart)「リモ心」.

Rimo-kokoron was never released to American markets, but it should have been. It involved linking people to various actions necessary to further the plot of a certain area.

The game was a pleasure to play.

Katamari Damacy is a game that exceeds Rimokokoron, simply because the plot is so simple. Roll stuff up in a ball to win. That's it.


The geat thing about this game is that chicks love it. Exquisite graphic design + easy game play = Chick game. I must admit I love it as well.

Ramo Nakajima Tribute

Though this man's name may not even ring a bell with even the most Japanese-literate foreigner, he is famous in Japan for his novels and general weirdness.

Nakajima Ramo is one of those crazy Osaka people, blessed with a writing talent and a love of making trouble. He was arrested for marijuana a couple of years ago (which usually means a few years in jail in Japan), received a suspended sentence, then fell down some stairs, cracked his head open, and died.


He was born in Amagasaki, a tough division of Osaka city that is known for producing comedians (DownTown), gangsters, and other interesting people.

Some my favorite books by him were 今夜、すべてのバ?で (Tonight, at all the bars in town), ガダラの豚 (The pigs of Gadara), なにわのアホぢから (The strength of Osakan stupidity), and こらっ (Damn you). "Tonight at all the bars in town" is a semi-biographical novel about his alcoholism, and why people are alcoholics. "The pigs of Gadara" is what I consider his masterpiece, and revolves around a sceptical professor of world religion and his wife, who joins a cult.

He was frequently a guest on TV shows in Japan, because the difference between his well-written, biting text on paper and his semi-conscious rambling on TV was stunning. His life of drugs and alcohol had ripped his life apart, and it was apparent. He was, in a way, the Japanese Hunter Thompson, except he was actually a good writer (zing!). Farewell, Ramo.

Japanese Cooking

Well, as I sit here, a substitute teacher at B------- High School, I thought I might impart some of my Japanese cooking knowledge to you.

First is the Sa-Shi-Su-Se-So rule, the most important of all cooking rules in Japanese cuisine. Sa Shi Su Se So are also the syllables 11-15 in the Japanese alphabet. Their significance is as follows:

Sa = Sato (Sugar)
Shi = Shio (Salt)
Su = Suu (Vinegar)
Se = Shoyu (Soy Sauce)
So = MiSo (Miso, or fermented bean paste)

If you are in the mood to cook Japanese often, these ingredients are a necessity in your kitchen. They are added to the dish in the order Sa Shi Su Se So.

Second is dashi. Dashi is necessary for that deep taste present in most stew-type Japanese dishes. Miso-shiru, men-rui (the different types of noodle dishes), nabe (a large pot with many different ingredients), and niku-jaga (a kind of beef stew) all contain dashi.

In fact, since niku-jaga is my favorite dish and the one I can cook the best, there is a good recipe for the dish here.


A few notes.

If you use dashi, there will frequently be a scum that boils to the top as lightly colored bubbles that disperse into a light brown covering. This is aku, and the amount of it that you remove from the pot with a seive is proportionate to how good the dish tastes. Get rid of it.

Don't work about finding ito-konyaku. It doesn't exist in America, which is sad because it is a 0-carb food and frequently used in diets.

Bon appetit!

OWF

Well, while I was teaching at one particular university in Japan, I would go the the school's ampitheater and watch Pro-Wrestling. Yes, Pro-Wrestling is an available club in most Japanese universities (perhaps they think they will get chicks), and OWF is one of those clubs that most Americans could not even imagine existed.

Osaka Gakuin Daigaku Wrestling Federation

Some of the "heros" of this wonderful group of young men are:


Rascal Fujiwara
5'8" 110 lbs.
Taunt Phrase: Get thinner! Thinner and thinner!


Maro Kuriyama
5'8" 170 lbs.
He is addicted to both Pro Wrestling and a certain idol, Aya Matsuura.



Bull Armer Takuya
5'11" 235 lbs.
Taunt Phrase: Being tanned is beautiful!

Ahh, I miss my stupid Japanese University!

Japanese Football

No, I'm not talking about soccer. The great thing about Japan, and when I say Japan, I mean the Osaka-Kyoto-Kobe area, is that college football there is GREAT. I still remember that Kinki University (a weak team) vs. Kansei Gakuin Daigaku (one of the strongest in Japan) match on a late night in September or October, with only 5 hours of sleep remaining until that commute to work.

The 3 hour game, cut into an hour of drives by sardonic editors who knew nothing about the paradox that is Japanese Football (i.e. small football players), was one of the best football games (excecution-wise) I had seen from a Japanese collegiate team. Usually Japanese collegiate (and professional) football ranks on the level of American high school in ability and professionalism. But something, something was different about the Kinki team.


The Kinki team (blue/white) and the Ritsumeikan team (maroon)

That fall of 2003, the Kinki defense had kept the Kansei Gakuin Daigaku quarterback guessing and the score was in the high 20s for both teams, Kinki on top by 2 or so. Kansei Gakuin Daigaku broke through in the last 20 seconds of the game, and scored a touchdown. With 10 seconds left, and 5 points behind, it looked to be all over for Kinki Daigaku. The ball was kicked high and long, and landed in the arms of one Tanabe (?). That bastard ran the ball 80-85 yards through the strongest team in collegate football (a team ranked #1 for 11 years (1990-2001). It was one of those moments that you were proud to be alive in Japan. For more info about Kansai Japanese Collegiate Football.

Ritsumeikan now dominates the Kansai IA league (having it's 33 consecutive win record cut short by Kansei Gakuin Daigaku). The lower collegiate league teams have hilarious names. The college I taught at had the somewhat mediocre "Blue Phoenix." There are IA teams with names Wild Rover and Seahorse. Some of the names are DOWNRIGHT HUMILIATING TO THE NAME OF FOOTBALL. Want examples? Tenri University's "Crushing Orcs", Wakayama University's "Blind Sharks", Osaka Foreign Language University's "Gamblers", Tottori University's "Rakers", and Hyogo Medical University's "Siegfreid".

OSAKA!

Here is Osaka City page's English explaination of things to do in Osaka:

America-Mura(American Village)
This area grew as young people opened up stores catering to their taste for American fashion. It is now a mecca of young casual fashion. The town expands to the north of America-Mura, to Minami Semba, and to the west to Kita and Minami Horie.

A Town of High-Class Brands
The area around the intersection of Midosuji Boulevard and Nagahoridori is called Shinsaibashi, which in earlier days, used to have a real bridge over the river. Presently, the Nagahori area has been transformed into a gigantic underground shopping center, Crysta Nagahori, with a river running over the ceiling. The sidewalks are lined with old style streetlights that are reminiscent of past days. This area has a concentration of high-class brand shops. People of various ages are seen enjoying window-shopping along the wide sidewalks. Many restaurants and cafes offer a break to weary shoppers and make the Shinsaibashi area a wonderful place for a fun walk.

Unique Shopping Area
To the east of Namba is Sennichimae Doguyasuji (literally, the utensils street). Here, one can find numerous items for the professional cook. One off the appeals of this district is that you can find anything from knives to pots, tableware to signboards and interior goods. The various food samples made of wax are well known and popular, including miniature sushi ? key holders.
Just south east of Doguyasuji is Nippombashi Den Den Town, a district specializing in the retail sale of electrical appliances. Here the determined shopper can find a variety of products, from home to electrical appliances, lights and batteries, and even the smallest screws.

Osaka: A Labyrinth of Shopping
In the vicinity of Umeda, there are different underground shopping areas such as Whity Umeda, Dojima Chika Center, Diamor, and Hankyu Sanbangai, all connected so as to form a large-scale underground shopping area. The older areas date back some 30 years.
In Shinsaibashi, Crysta Nagahori holds the premier floor space in Western Japan. In Namba, Namba Walk, Nan Nan Town, and Namba City have gained popularity as a fantastic underground shopping area tying train stations and shopping areas together.
____________________________________________________________________________________

Dude, who cares about Osaka's shopping areas? The only thing good about Osaka is eating and drinking!

And ....

梅田行きのキップ買って
紀ノ国屋で待っちきって
梅田行きのキップ買って
三番街から茶屋町 (あ、ええ感じですよね　そやねー)

梅田行きのキップ買って (アベックだらけ)
カンテＧでやっぱチャイとケーキ (アベックだらけ)
梅田行きのキップ買って (アベックだらけ)
やっぱキタはそんなこんなで　ええなぁー

OSAKA　STRUT　Just　keep　on
OSAKA　STRUT

(セリフ)さぁー、どっか行こうか　どこ行こか
へーこいて帰ろか　クソして寝よか
おまえ暇やろ、茶ーでも飲みに行けへんか
カヨちゃんバイトしてる店、あれ、どこやったっけ
この辺ちゃうん？
あーあれー、この道ブワーッと行って
グワーッと曲がって、でっかいビル、ボワーン立ってるから
その角シュッと曲がんねん、あー、なるほど
おい、おまえ、あれ、おまえのおとんちゃうんか？
“おー宮内くーん、元気でやってるかー”
“あっ、はい”あーびっくりしたー
めちゃ腹へったな、なんか食うか
うどんは？　いらんなー　マクドええ味出しとんで
まぁ、うどんでええか
“はい、お兄ちゃん、ネギおまけー”
うわっ、おばちゃん、ごちそうさま　いつもありがとう
おばちゃん　なんぼこれ？
“はい、おおきに、三百マンエーン”
ナニはなくともナニワはサイコー
他に比べりゃ外国同然


OSAKA　STRUT　Just　keep　on
OSAKA　STRUT
ナニワンギター　何？
Ah　Yeah
OSAKA　STRUT　
Keep　on　strut
OSAKA　STRUT

(セリフ)んー今度どこ行こうかなーおまえ
んーどこ行こかー、あっ、でも阪神タイガース
やっぱ今年は、がんばって欲しいよなー
うわーハデな奴、あの服なんぼぐらいすんのかな
あっ、ちょっと待って、タバコ買って来るからタバコ
わっ、ちょーオバハン、割り込むなよ　おまえ
足踏んでる、痛い痛い痛い、痛いて、おまえ
“兄ちゃん、毛ー長いから女の子かと思たやんか
もーよー言わんわー”
何言うとんねん、このオバハンは
おい、ちょ、ちょー見てん、あの女、ええケツしてると
思わへん？　あっ、ほんまや、ちょーおまえ前まで行って
顔見て来いや、宮内
どやった？　んーちょっとなー、えっ、ちょっとてなんやねん
あんまし、かわいない、いや　かわいーかなー
どっちか言うたらかわいーかな
どっちやねんな、おまえは!!
ナニはなくともナニワはサイコー
他に比べりゃ外国同然


OSAKA　STRUT　Keep　on
OSAKA　Ah…　Yeah
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
あれもこれもあんでー
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
えーとこやでおいで
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
あれもこれもあんでー
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
えーとこ知ってる
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
あれもこれもあんでー
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
えーとこやでおいで
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
あれもこれもあんでー
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
えーとこ知ってる
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
Just　keep　on　strut
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
On　more　strut
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
Everybody
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
あ　みんなみんなみんなみんなみんな
(OSAKA)
Hey
(OSAKA)
Hey　Yeah　Yeah　Yeah
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
Keep　on　strut
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
えーとこやでおいで
(OSAKA　OSAKA)
ジスイズ　OSAKA　STRUT

Hiromi Go

I just needed a Hiromi Go moment....

「出逢いは億千万の胸騒ぎ まばゆいくらいに
エキゾチック・ジャパン
出逢いは億千万の胸騒ぎ 生命のときめき
エキゾチック エキゾチック・ジャパン ジャパン」